Rant: Judgmental People

I just saw some comments on Facebook about Oregon passing a bill for free abortions. These were coming from pro-life Christians I know. Comments of “sick people” and “monsters”. This really upset me and shows how little these people understand about women who choose to have an abortion. There are dozens of reasons why they would make this choice.

For those who agree with these comments, I have a few questions for you.

Have you ever had to make the agonizing decision of continuing your pregnancy or aborting a baby for a varietyΒ of reasons?

If you insist that a pregnant mother continue her pregnancy, are you willing to put your money where you mouth is and help her pay for the costs of having that baby? Are you going to buy diapers and formula for her? Are you going to hold her hand during labor? Are you going to babysit this infant so the mother can work? Are you going to be there for her when she can’t physically, emotionally, mentally or financially care this tiny child?

If she decides to give the baby up for adoption, are you willing to adopt the child?

Unless you answer “yes” to these questions, you are so totally out of line judging someone else’s choices.

So, who really are the sick monsters?

“Judge not lest ye be judged” ~ Matthew 7

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To clarify, I am a Pro Choice Atheist who understands the trauma of having to make this decision. I had to do it twice.

The first time I was 20, became pregnant and we decided to get married. Until I walked in on him in bed with another girl. I was 3 months pregnant and worried if I could afford to have a baby on my own and if I was emotionally mature enough to raise a child. I sought counseling from Planned Parenthood and in the end decided to have my baby. But I miscarried three weeks later.

The second time was after I married and became pregnant almost immediately after the wedding. I had gotten sick with food poisoning and the doctor said that the baby would most likely be mentally disabled because of it. We agonized over the decision to have the baby or abort and again decided to go ahead with the pregnancy. Again, I miscarried, this time in the 5th month.

Two pregnancies, two horrible decisions, two miscarriages. I was terrified to try again, but a year later, I gave birth to a healthy son.

I have several friends who had abortions and none of them went into the choice lightly. But all of them said they don’t regret the decision. It allowed them to have the family, the career or lifestyle they have afterwards.

But I also talked to several women who felt pressured to have their babies. One was just 14 when she got pregnant and was 20 with a 6 year old child when I met her. She hated motherhood, resented her daughter and felt cheated of her teenage years due to having a baby long before she was ready for it. Others echoed these same sentiments. When it came down to it, none of these young women felt like they have any support when they have their babies, being told “you made your bed”… it’s your own fault.

These are the same people who don’t want kids to have good sex education and birth control and then abandon them when the naive kids get pregnant.

3 thoughts on “Rant: Judgmental People

  1. I’m sorry that happened to you and I know it’s really pissing to hear. Thanks for sharing, it helps spread awareness!

    Like

    1. Thank you for your comment. I wish I could believe it would spread awareness, but I think some people will never change their attitudes.

      Like

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